This is a transcript of a call made to a divorce helpline this week;

adviser: “Hello”

caller:  “Are you a solicitor?”

adviser: ” No, sorry.”

caller: “GOOD! COS I F***ING HATE THEM, B*ST*RDS AND C**TS THE LOT OF THEM!!”

adviser “please dont shout or swear – did you have a question?”

caller: “erm, I’ve forgotten it now, can I call you back?”